my boy's growing up.

So I wake up today and realize... Kal'els not a baby anymore. He's a big boy now.. haha. He's going on two. HIS TERRIBLE TWOS. He's started talking, and runs like a mad man. He's so big now :(. I still love him like you can't even imagine. He's my boy. and the cutest freaking kid you'll EVER see. I love him. My sister needs to pop out another one.
-
I am going out tonight with my friend Katie! It should be a good time. Then, hopefully I'm hanging out with Derrick tomorrow night. We'll see how shit works out. I know I have to work tomorrow... boooo.
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I am watching tivo american idol I missed this week. :) I love it.

Okay I obviously have nothing to talk about. Its been a dumb week.

Peace :)

2/23/09

Well; I honestly don't have much to blog about, but we'll give it a go.
My "OK" button and "0/next" button on my phone weren't working, so I took it to Verizon today to get all that fixed. I guess it needs a "software update", so that's what I'm doing as of now; sitting around.. waiting on this update they speak of.
Today, I woke up and went to work at 11. I got home at 2, and am going to the game vs clearfork tonight at like mmmmm 5:45? I'm pumped. I need to fill up my gas tank and its FREEZING. ugh I DESPISE WINTER!!!! It can suck it.
I just looked at the TV n for some reason it says, "TV will turn off soon".. I don't get it.
So, I have to write a speech by Wednesday..........and informative speech. I have no idea what to freaking do. I'll wait till Tuesday night. I work better when its last minute. BELIEVE IT OR NOT.
Well this is boring.. maybe I'll have more exciting news later...............? Let's hope for the best.

Peace

"I'm sick and tired of being.. sick and tired"

Even now I can smell your clothes

Freshly from the wash,

Still hot from the dryer.

Even now I can smell your skin

As I wrap you in a towel,

Lay you on the bed,

and try to love you

Even now I can feel your arms.

I can hear your songs.

And I always can find you again.

Even now I can feel your hand

Gently over mine,

With almost no weight at all.

Even now I can feel your eyes.

Watch me as I strum

Much too late at night.

Even now I can see you smile.

I can hear you hum.I can hear you sing.

And I always can find you again.

Even in the dark of night.

Even in the lowest light.

Even as the world outside is spinning, And spinning

Even now I can feel your hair

Blow across my cheek

As we sit in one of two chairs.

Even now I can feel you face

Resting on my chest,

Wrestling for sleep and failing at it.

Even now I can see you sleep.

I can see you dream.I can see you fly.

And I always can find you again.

And I always can find you again.

----

Is it always going to be this hard? Getting over your first.. the one you thought you'd love forever and always. The one you thought you'd marry. Will he always be in the back of my mind.. will I always have nights where I just cry and cry cause I can't protect him or help him or hold him when things are bad anymore. He won't listen.. to anyone. I thought we'd be each others number ones for life... but his number one became something utterly discusting and pathetic.. and now I sit. and pray to God, he'll realize how much I love him soon before all my patience and desire goes away. I just want to help him.....................but I can't be his "friend".. its too hard falling in love with someone all over again.. when they aren't feeling the same cause they are too high to fucking get it.

---

I know I know, you're probably thinking "get over it kirstie". But I don't care anymore. I can't hide behind a wall forever. And I don't care what anyone thinks of me. I lost my love and my best friend. I don't even know who to talk to about anything in my life. God....

---

Enoughs enough. Today was shitty......... apparently. I work with catty bitches. LIKE HIGHSCHOOL. I like two people I work with and ones the freaking manager.

This girl literally got pissed tonight because I am the "new girl" and I was bussing tables faster then her. GET OVER IT, and move your ass. Seriously what the f*ck.

I am new, therefore I've been more than nice to everyone and I worked really hard tonight cause we were really busy. Bruce (our manager) kept stopping me and saying "seriously Kirstie you're doing very good.. keep it up".. then this BITCH decides to run her mouth about how I'm bussing all the tables. DOn't complain IDIOT.. YOU BARELY DID SHIT. ugh.. wow. Then when I asked her to grab the next few she says, "eh I don't really feel like it".. EH OK.

I'm seriously nice to everyone I work with and I'm really friendly with everyone.. so whats the reason to talk shit about someone YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW.. really????

wooow.. can you tell how my days been????

---

I'm "dogsitting" for my rents this wknd while their in the burgh doing taxes shit. I miss them. They know how to fix everything. :( So anyways, I come home from work tonight ready to sit down and do hw... and what do you know? I DON'T GET IT. Whatever........

I need to quit complaining. Things are coming around for me.. I'm doing good in school (now that chem is out of the freakin way), I have a job where at least my managers like me, and I have the greatest friends. So what the hells my problem???

---

I need Oscar at times like these.......................

Well if you actually sat through all this bitching.. thanks. and congrats: you know my boring life.

ciao

te amo muchisimo oscar de jesus melo sandoval.

Bad start to a "good" morning.....

So I woke up this morning ready to get a move on. I was meeting a friend from work to go workout, then get cold stone (weird combo I know). So I get up, pull my hair back, put on a sweatshirt and shoes, and walk out the door.
I stop outside for a second to admire the snowfall and how lucky we are to live in Ohio and this kind of weather :) ...............................................NOOOOOOOT! FFFF that.
Anyways, I go to open my car door, and WHAT DO YOU KNOW?? It didn't open. IT DIDN'T OPEN. Oh my goodness I locked my keys in my car. I ALWAYS ALWAYS double check.. so I don't know WHAT I was thinking last night when I came home. Daaaamn. Oh and ps: I have no spare key to my piece of shit car. Amazing. So here I am, sitting and waiting on the brother in law to get home and make it all better (cross your fingers). UUUGH. I was really proud of myself for waking up and getting ready to go work out.. and here I am. I could still be sleeping still.. at 11:30..haha.
So I'm SO excited for the game tonight. Really! I think it's goign to be a good game. The boys are doing so so good, and honestly I really have noone to watch.. but I still love going. I need to get a plain white sweatshirt today.. except I only have 70? dollars to last me two wks. Grrreeat. Wish me luck on that.
I'm on facebook (what's new????) and OSCAR just messaged me. Therefore, I've forgotten about my keys and I'm just thinking good thoughts because he makes me happy. I DO NOT think people understand how much I miss him. :( I'll be okaaaay.
I have a smile on today.. Noone better ruin it :) (bad drivers will I just know it...)

Okay, Scott's on his way home to fix my problem.. cause I'm 12.

Peace&Love and I hope to see everyone tonight!! :]

So I have a headache, a bad one. It doesn't help that I'm listening to halo on fullblast either...... fun. So I think I'm just going to become a lesbian or something (just kiddin). But no, guys are assholes and unappreciative and disrespectful. Uugh.
I'm very excited for the basketball game tomorrow. WHITEOUT(everyone wear white). Being this excited may have something to do with the fact I did nothing today. Just maybe.. either way. Then on Saturday, I'm hanging out with Halli, Jordan, Chels, and maybe Dani! And I'm SO SO excited. I haven't seen them in SO SO long. Oh my goodness. Well, ok I've seen Dani.. but not the others. YAY! Downside of saturday?? I work! At 4:30, with the hostesses I haven't met yet. I've been training with Katie, therefore she's like my comfort zone and now I won't have her. boooo. Ah well, I know what I'm doing basically anyway.
My dvd player broke.. it my room. It just shit the bed. (sigh).. so now I don't know what I'm going to do. Hopefully my sister will order me a box soon so that I can just have tv in my bedroom. That'd be nice. She thinks I can't save $7 a month to pay her for it. Nice huh??
I've been working out all wk. I feel so good about it. However.. I don't think I've lost the desired weight that I want to. Esp since I just ate Taco Bell. Greeeeat.
Welp; that's what I'm going to go do....

Peace&Love

So, my sister is watching Quarentine, which I saw in the theatre. It's stupid, but whatever; I'm sitting through it for a second time.
School was alright tonight. I learned in FYE that I can't follow directions....special. I have to give a "informative speech" next Wed, in Speech class. Any ideas?? Please... haha, I honestly have to idea what to inform my class of for 5-7 minutes. We'll see.
I'm housesitting this wknd at my moms. Well; more like "dogsitting". Anyone wanna join me?? I'm definently going to the game Friday. I'm so excited. Its for the league champs?? I guess they beat us last time too, so it should be interesting.
Sidenote: I just looked up at the tv.. it looks discusting. Don't watch this movie.
I work tomorrow. sigh. My second day, so that should be thrilling. (Let's hope). I have to wear ALL black, like I'm going to a funeral; not very exciting.
So anyways; there is absolutely nothing new with me. I miss the Weiss' a whole bunch. =(.. Whatever, I need to learn to deal.

ps: I'm on my way to losing ten pounds.. seriously. Wish ME luck.

Peace&Love once again....



pss: I FREAKING MISS MY BEST FRIEND. someone buy me a trip to Mexico. I'll forever be thankful.

STUPID PEOPLE....

I hope this makes the news..haha.
I really really like to be open minded. But all this is becoming nonsense::::

I just saw a preview for the news. It said that people are starting to say the Facebook is violating there privacy. REALLY? Because, I'm pretty sure I use it and you post WHAT YOU WANT. You aren't made to post anything. If you don't like it, get the hell off of the internet?? Maybe?
I'm sick of hearing about how bad myspace and facebook are. I'm sick of hearing how people are getting murdered and what not cause of these site. NO, it's cause of jackasses who don't set their profiles to PRIVATE or they post exactly where they live or something. Crazy.
Myspace and Facebook both allow you to set your profiles to private. You can choose who you add and who will be able to look at your shit. So if you or your children are DUMB enough not to do that...or to add people you don't know...then that's you and their own problem.
People really need to stop focusing on things that don't matter, like websites that CAN be controlled and hollywood and celebrities.
My brother is at war ok? I think you should focus a bit more on the important shit, rather then meaningless things that people are too stupid to get in the first place.

Here I am complaining again. But really, can't you research your shit before saying how bad something is. When it's not................

okay, love you

It's been awhile.....

So Valentines Day is dumb. Why can't you tell the person you love you love them everyday, or bring them gifts every day???? hmm..
Okay that was random, but seriously. So, what's new with me? NOTHING. I dropped Chemistry; I guess a dropped class looks better than a failed class.....let's hope.
I have a new obsession with M&Ms.. I eat them all the time. They are delicious.
Oh my goodness! I went to buy pens today. OK PENS! So I go into Staples with $5. I COULD BARELY AFFORD PENS. I'm not shitting with you. I had to get some cheap ones for 3.99. That's freaking ridiculous. Wow, I'm mad about it.
Another thing I'm angry about (and I don't care who sees it).. is the drill team. Well, the seniors on the drill team. They keep saying how happy they are it's over. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? What the hell.. appreciate the time you had because you don't get it back. They also don't appreciate how amazing they did and who got them there.... uuugh.
So, I left nutrition tonight and just can't stop thinking about how ridiculous society's obsession with weight is. Not a day goes by that I don't think about being skinnier and what I can do to get there and I'm not shitting you. It's terrible and I'm guessing I'm not the only one like this.. I'm among many. It's not right.. we should all feel beautiful in our skin and what God gave us. We should be able to eat whatever we want whenever we want. JUST WORK OUT. But if you're like me and read every magazine on the shelves, it makes it hard to not wanna look like those woman. They are twigs. I could break up them...and yet I wish I was skinnier all the time and I'm not even overweight. Pathetic.
I'm being really pessimistic tonight I just realized. It's all because boys are stupid and ruin my life and make me sad. I just wanna be alone and enjoy the one life I get without a freaking broken hear. I wanna be happy all the freaking time. I'm sick of being used and not appreciated for the person I am. I try to be the best person I can be.. and if you don't like it. &*$@ off and stop texting me out of the blue CAUSE YOUR BORED. Every single time you just break my heart more...happy? uuugh. I don't even think anyone is reading this but if you are thanks for letting me vent.

ok I'm going to go watch american idol and quit my bitching.

ps: I LOVE MY NEPHEW. without him, I wouldn't of smiled much lately.

peace&love

siiick!

SO, I've been sick for three days and have missed two days of classes... poop. I hope my grades don't drop........
90210 is on tonight! and american idol! yay! I love tv. I don't care if one day I'm an idiot cause I watch too much tv... :) Life is ok... Tumbleweed hasn't called me back though. I'm stressing out a little. Everything happens for a reason right?? Please.................................................
I need a life.. I mean a better one. I just wanna move away, get a job, and live life to the fullest. OMG you will never guess who just called! TUMBLEWEED! I got the job. fackin A I'm pumped! YEEESSS. I can calm down now. :)
I am so sick of this sickness... my nose freaking hurts from blowing it so much :( I need chicken noodle soupy. :)
I'm going to go. This was a dumb blog, but oh well.

PeAcE&love

My Weekend

So I went to Columbus and stayed with Dani on Thursday. We had sooo much fun. I met alot of people. It just made me realize there is so much more out there. There is a world that's SO much bigger than this place. I'm sick of wooster/mans/ashland/loudonville. I need to get as far away as I can. I'm annoyed.
Anyways.. I miss Dani/Columbus already and it's only Monday.
I came home Saturday, and went the the "boy/girl" dance. Special..

ANYWAYS- then I went down to Muskingum and stayed with Andy and his friends, and Byron. After that, shit just went down hill. But, I'm not getting into it. I need to learn not to get my freaking hope up. I just hurt myself in the long-run. Whatever. I have school all wk and no money to get there. Fascinating huh? NO. I'm freaking out. UUghh. I won't have money until like the 12th. so that's what? 10 days? yea. NEAT. So I'd like to go watch the girls dance this Friday.... we'll see how my money situation is............................................ who knows.

Alright, I'm gonna head out cause talking about this is just pissing me off more.

Peace&Love